Any Dream Will Do

I am often not a big fan of singing competitions.  I'm an on and off again view of American Idol in that sometimes I watch a full season, sometimes I don't.  As someone who has taken vocal lessons, sung solos and been in choruses on stage, I find the competitions painful.  People sing off key, they make poor song choices, and the judges tend to give ridiculous advice, advice that I have never heard from anyone remotely interested in providing constructive criticism or praise to a professional artist.

I've already blogged about my love/hate relationship with the American Idol audition episodes.  I'm still watching this season (go Kris!!!!  go Alison!!!) and enjoying it for the most part.  I still can't physically watch Adam Lambert sing (he makes strange eyes at the tv and I feel like I need a shower after every performance) but his "artistry" (god help me I used the same term as Kara) is growing on me.

While I'm determined to watching the rest of American Idol this season, I'm afraid to say that my heart has been stolen by another reality tv singing competition: Any Dream Will Do.  This show is brilliant.  The entire goal is to find the man who will be cast as Joseph in the next West End production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor (it's on BBC America on Sunday nights).  I was in this show in high school and Joseph is an incredible show.  It touches on almost every modern musical style and has the potential to be directed in so many ways that it really represents an opportunity for someone to express themselves on a stage in a way that many musicals don't offer.  Plus, I still use the song that lists off all of Joseph's brothers as my only solid way to remember the names of Jacob's sons.  Sad?  Possibly.  Also awesome.

The show is really corny.  The opening credits shows the 12 finalists are singing various parts of songs from the show while wearing ridiculous technicolor coats and I giggle horribly every time I see it (it's possible I also rewind to watch it multiple times, it's that great brand of cheesy goodness).  The men involved (and its all men and I think every one of them has been filmed without their shirt and it's only like the 3rd episode) are all part drama queen, part pseudo-macho because really, Joseph is exactly that.  He has to be pretty, well, pretty, while still being able to belt out a good portion of a 2.5 hour show.  The first show showed them going to "Joseph school" (ie can they sing?  can they dance?  are they hot?) and now it is on to the live performances.  Each man sings and then one gets kicked off.  They all sing different kinds of songs and some even get dancers to work with them (the dancers are kind of high school dance teamy, which just adds to the campiness of the whole show).  I like that some sing very showy songs while other pick songs that aren't showy, but they try and make them such.  And it's only the first live episode and they have already showed some poor girl crying.  It's great and my words can't really do it justice.  And have I mentioned Gram Norton is the host?!?!?

I know that we've already had shows in America to find the next Elle Woods or members of the Grease cast, but I couldn't really get into those shows. I don't know if I have more interest in this because I've actually performed in this show or if it's just more fun to watch the Brits do this.  I just know that I'm going to keep watching.  

Seriously outside the cornfield: Houston edition

For reasons I still can't rationalize, work sent me to Houston, TX, this week under the auspices that somewhere there was someone that needed my help with something.  Despite what I'm sure most of my friends think, I'm not used to being the smartest person in the room at work and tend to spend the better part of the work day sitting back at listening to people with way more knowledge and experience than myself.  I learn a ton and it's great.  Today was the exact opposite of that.

First, I should state that I don't think I've been to Houston in 15 years, not since the Bar Mitzvah of a cousin who I don't really speak to anymore for various reasons.  I have few memories of the city (except those involving Bas Mitzvahs and insane weddings), but those memories are enough to make me heavily dislike the entire state (despite that I spend a lot of time at work dealing with issues in Texas and won't be getting rid of those projects any time soon).  

I forgot how flat it is here.  How everything next to the highway seems to look like a rundown strip mall.  How it was clearly affected by multiple hurricanes.  How spread out it all is.  I had just forgot.  I now remember.  And that hasn't really improved my opinion of the city.  The little that I'm seeing of it (I'm spending a lot of time in meetings and giving a presentation, not exploring the city) isn't leaving the best impression and the only real upside was that I had been having nightmares for the last week about the people I was going to meet with down here and those were fairly unfounded.

There is one man in particular who I was scheduled to meet with here that has really been peeving me for weeks.  He is a rather brash individual, the kind you almost never meet in the Cornfield but who I stereotypically believe exist almost exclusively in the South (this feeling is completely not based on fact) and has been recently been calling me at work and complaining a lot.  I won't go so far as to call him a Redneck but he's up-front in a way that is not seen in the Cornfield and tends to say exactly what is on his mind with less of a filter than anyone.  EVER.  Anyway, he showed up for my presentation and we had planned to meet with his Coalition members after to look at data quality.  I was pretty convinced that at some point he would start a fight, there would be yelling (people from the Cornfield don't like yelling except at football games), and I would have to lose my calm work demeanor and get in this guy's face.  A colleague (also at the meeting) informed me that he would have no problem playing the bad cop and punching the guy out if he got in my face.  I'm happy to work with such awesome people.

Anyway, after all of this build-up, all the stress, the bad dreams, what does this guy do?  Shows up for my presentation, sits in the front row and damn near falls asleep during my various parts of my presentation.  Look, the presentation wasn't exciting; it was about homeless data quality and even I'll admit it's dry stuff and I can only tell so many funny stories before it goes down hill.  But was it snooze worthy?  NO.  THEN, after all his BS, he shows up at the meeting for his community and basically says nothing.  Does nothing.  Offers nothing.  I was so disappointed.  Part of me was looking for a fight, after all the emotional energy I've spent on this guy, part of me wanted to scream at him a bit.  But nothing.  He offered one sarcastic comment at one point then told me later he was happy I came and it was very informative.  Whatever.  *sigh*  I guess this is the part of the job where you swoop in, fix a problem, and pray you don't get a phone call later reminding you that everyone can be an adult when you are in the room with them, but a child once you go home.

I'm going back to DC tomorrow and will be happy to have this trip over.  Besides the general frustration I've felt for Houston, this was my first major trip where I was almost on my own, presenting in front of a lot of people (without notes!  or practice!  so excited I can do this off the cuff!) and being really displayed as an expert.  It's a lot of pressure in some ways, I'll be excited to get back to my office, where I can quietly sit and feel uninformed.

Can't the camera focus on something else?

The Idol gods have spoken and it appears as though it was not to be for our fair Tatiana.  Everyone knows how I feel about her: I think she is effing nuts.  She plays to the camera as she goes crazy and gives the world the impression that she is both insane and hungry to be a celebrity.  Case in point: this week on Idol.  She gives a relatively decent performance (I know, it was hard to admit, but her voice isn't half bad) and then appears to be a normal adult, but only up until the judges note that they basically thought she was nuts and didn't understand why she wasn't nuts all the time.  It's possible that's the point where I started yelling "'Cause she's faking dumb arses!"  When she got back up to the "green room" she started her whole on-air persona, going on about america and dreams and BLAH BLAH BLAH.  Sure enough, last night, she brought out the crazy a bit as she went on about faith or America or I'm not going to lie, I totally spaced out.  And America didn't buy it and she isn't in the Top 12.  I got giddy.

But then something happened that just peeved me.  As the show ended, the camera kept moving from the three individuals who made it through to Tatiana, who was balling on the side of the stage, and all I could think was how horrible it was.  I know she displayed every emotion under the sun in a 10-second interview during Hollywood Week, but there was something semi-private about that moment and I really didn't want to see it.  And I'm not sure she wanted us to either.

During the 2000 NCAA Men's basketball tournament (stay with me here), Iowa State made it all the way to the Elite Eight, something that almost never happens for us Cyclones.  I can't remember who they played, but they held it together for most of the game.  As the timer wound down though, my Cyclones started to lose it and in the last two minutes pretty much laid down and died.  I remember this game for a number of reasons (if they had won they would have played the Badgers and that was going to be a serious conflict for me), the most vivid being camera work at the end of the game.  Instead of showing the game, the cameras focused on Paul Shirley, an ISU player who was so invested in the game he began crying as they lost.  I felt so horrible for him, having this incredibly personal emotional moment on national TV and I just wanted the camera to turn away so that he could have that moment to himself.

The same goes for Tatiana.  As crazy as I fear she is, that seemed like a make-or-break moment in life and I know she signed on to having that happen on TV when she chose to audition, but part of me wishes she could have had that moment to herself, away from the drama, whether she wanted to or not.

My camera phone won't win any awards, but it rocks my casbah.

Here's why.

I broke down and got a cell phone with a camera about a year ago.  My phone doesn't connect to the internet (every other gadget I own seems to) so that renders the camera slightly useless.  I basically can take pictures of my friends and have those pictures flash when they call.  Not that exciting (and now that I think about it, not that nerdy).  But a couple of months ago I figured out the best use of my camera phone EVER: a photo "to-read" list.  

Here is how this works.  I tend to end up wandering around bookstores a lot, mostly just trying to piddle away some time while I wait for someone.  I pass a lot of books that look interesting and I used to always forget their names so that when it came to picking out a new book I would have to sort of rack my brain for the titles of books I had seen.  My camera phone (plus goodreads.com) has totally solved this problem.  Now, I just wonder around the bookstore and snap a photo of every book that looks interesting.  Then I go home, go through my pictures, and put the various books onto my "to-read" list. 

I know this is kind of a lame use of technology, but each time I do this, I get a little excited 'cause seriously, it's one of the few ways technology makes my life just a little bit easier.  Someday I may get a more hi-tech phone, but in the meantime, I'm cool with just using the camera to keep my "to-read" list up-to-date.  And take photos of my friends of course.

Idol insanity

Now that the auditions are finished, I'm all over American Idol.  Hollywood week, in my opinion, is the perfect cycle of drama, though I'm at a loss to describe exactly why.  My major disappointment this year is that we've seen so few people actually sing.  I know that the Idol is about more than singing; it's about being a commodity and a performer.  But before I start fake voting people out of the Top 36 ('cause I never really vote, I'm passive like that), I want to hear something from all of them.  For a "singing" competition, I don't think that is too much to ask.

But since we apparently aren't going to hear all of them sing, can I just say something?  WHAT THE HELL IS TATIYANA?!?!?!  I'm sorry, but how is this chick still around?  She is NUTS.  And while at times she seems to display some sort of decent singing voice, I'm sorry, there is no way in hell that this girl deserves to be on this show with an act like that.  I cannot think of a single music director or acting director that would ever put up with her desperate divaness, especially from an amateur.  If she were already an Idol and was pulling this crap people would probably allow it (though I can guarantee I would still think it was ridiculous), but I can't imagine any professional tolerating this BS.  I can't decide if her continued existence is for the drama or if she'll actually make it through on her voice.  

I'm in the middle of watching the episode where they present the Top 36 and they haven't clued us in to her fate yet but I can only hope that she goes the way of Bikini Girl soon.  Otherwise, I may actually call in the first week JUST to vote her off.

My vindication!

I knew I wasn't the only one who had a problem with these damn 25 Items posts!  Click here.  

(I have a much more insightful post forming in my head about this amazing documentary I saw this week, but I haven't quite figured out what to say, so stay tuned)

My 25 things dilema

If you are on Facebook, you probably got bombarded with the "25 Random Things Note," in which your friends wrote down 25 random things you might not know about them, tagged you, and expected you to do the same.  I've been avoiding my response for a few reasons.  One, I always wonder where the stuff I put about myself (blog included) goes in cyber space.  Who reads it, who cares?  Tagging people with a list of 25 things that I think are important just seems strange, like I'm forcing them to recognize that these are the things I think are interesting about myself, whether or not they actually are.  I wonder if they are what my friends find interesting about me and I wonder if it just fosters some sort of idea in my mind that I'm far more interesting and important than I actually am.

I'm also avoiding it because I'm having the worst time coming up with 25 things.  For the past few years I've taken the approach that my life is an open book and that if there is something I really don't want to talk about or have people know about me, I just don't talk about it.  Therefore, most people who know me know a lot about me.  In discussing this with a friend the other night, she promptly informed me I'm not that mysterious.  This kind of shocked me (who doesn't like a little mystery) and made me realize that people may be under the impression that just because I say a lot of things, I'm saying everything.  And I'm not.  And I have no idea how to convey to people that the verbal dribble that comes from my mouth is possibly the tip of an iceberg, though I have no idea how much of the iceberg is hiding under water.  Who knows what this says about me, but it might say something.  Maybe.  Probably not.

The problem may also be that everyone knows the random information about people, but not the core stuff that informs us, our decisions, and our actions.  I don't know how to expand on that thought, but it is something I worry about from time to time.

In the mean time, I have 13 random things you might not know about me.  If I come up with 12 more, you might see it posted on Facebook.  Maybe.